In hospital I had a little issue with my blood pressure. Now this shouldn’t be exactly unexpected, as my blood pressure is quite low to start with, but it did concern the nursing staff and they didn’t seem to understand why I could be laughing and joking when my BP was 58 over 40, instead of just being unconscious....
Their response to me being under-pressured, was to attach me to bags of fluid and start pumping them into my arm as fast as they could and gradually my blood pressure went up to what I considered to be normal. Nurse and doctor came round and checked the chart and tut-tutted a bit –“ let’s give her one more bag of fluid overnight”, said the doctor, “and see if we can’t get it right”.
Morning follows night and the nurse comes round. My blood pressure is 122 over 70! “Ah, perfect” says the nurse, “that’s exactly what it should be”
“That’s all very well”, says I, “but why does my arm now look like it belongs to the Stay Puft Marshmallow man?”
You will be pleased to note that after visiting the toilet every two hours for the next few days, I returned to normal size and presumably ‘normal’ blood pressure!
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