Last week I had physio - in itself a completely unremarkable act, apart from the unspeakable pain that physio-terrorists seem to delight in putting you through! Anyway, I went out to the car, climbed in and drove up the hill....just like any other day (as they say in the movies). At the top of the hill, I did a u-turn* and as I did so, the traction control (ESP) light came on (or as I like to think of it, the little skiddy car symbol!) and then went off again. I know, I know, this is really boring, isn't it! Drove back down the hill (waved at the cat sitting in the window - unremarkably, she did not wave back!) and headed for the junction at the bottom. As I did so, the light came back on, which was odd, because I was not red-lining the car or waggling the steering wheel or driving on oil, ice or wet leaves. Aha! I thought, its a French car, it must be an electrical fault! Actually I don't know why I'm maligning French cars here, I just felt the need...
Anyway, long story short (it is 15 miles to the physio office after all), I got to my appointment and figured I'd worry about the light later. OK, got tortured, came back out to car. Started engine, light was out. Drove 200m to edge of car park, light came back on. The car's only done 2400 miles (it was new in August - how posh is that!) so I figured I'd take it to the main dealers....and it was at that time, that things started to get odd.
I turned right out of the car park. Up to the top of the hill, and right again. Up as far as the college and another right. (And FYI, I wasn't going round in a circle, that's just the way home!) Turned right into Tesco to get fuel and noticed that the steering wheel wasn't returning to centre. Got fuel. Out of Tesco (yep, you've guessed it), right turn again. By now the steering wheel was at 45° and as I drove down the road, it gradually got worse. The car was driving almost perfectly, but by the time I got to the dealers, the steering wheel was out by 90° - it was very, very odd.
In the dealers (their name is Lookers in case you are looking for rotten customer service), I told them about the light being on...and said, "oh yes, and by the way, the steering is out by 90°". Fair play, they said they couldn't look at it that day and so drove me home promising to look at it in the morning...Life was strange, but good.... Further instalments of this exciting tale will appear on this blog in the near future...!
*also unremarkable- the car was facing in the wrong direction for the physio's office
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