The suit of armour

I read somewhere on one of the forums I belong to about someone complaining about being stuck in a suit of armour. Well, maybe they didn’t say they were actually stuck; I think perhaps it was just something to describe how their body felt. Anyway, despite searching the archives, I haven’t been able to find the particular post again so I can remember what version of it I like, I guess.

The thread writer explained that it was something to do with a strange sensation around their ribcage that they had after having had their ribs removed for anterior surgery. The memory of the thread only stayed with me as it seemed some kind of odd comparison – I mean how many people actually get to wear suits of armour these days. I suppose its possible she belonged to some kind of medieval re-enacting society but surely as a ‘girlie’ she wouldn’t be trying on the armour (unless it was like this). Anyway, you can imagine that with a brain like mine (you must be getting an idea of how I am just a little bit odd by now) – the mental picture stayed with me of this poor woman trapped in her suit of armour.

Many moons have gone by since that post, but I find myself thinking about it a lot recently. In fact, I have good reason to, as the area around my ribcage is starting to feel quite odd. Now it may be all the bending and stretching I’m doing and all the lifting my arm up (darn sports again!) but it feels umm not unlike you would imagine a suit of armour if it were a bit tight. It’s something like a one sided corset – maybe something like half of this ^*1 . BTW, please don’t look at this picture if you are

• a) underage..... or
• b) have never learned about the birds and the bees and fetish wear.

The suit of armour description is sounding better all the time – I can’t go round telling people it feels like I have a tight rubber corset where my ribs used to be – they’d think I was mad^*2! It’s not a bit like telling them I feel like I’m wearing a suit of armour – I’m sure they’d think that was all quite normal after all…

^*1Torture v. thickening waist??–ummm, pass the chocolate please…
^*2…der. You don’t get it – read it and this again – quickly and in sequence thank you!